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Stress-Busting Strategies for the Overworked Mind

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Are you feeling like a smartphone with 20 apps running in the background? You’re not alone. Our overworked minds can turn into a juggling act of stress balls—work, family, social life, and the occasional curveball life throws our way. But fear not, dear reader, because today we’re going to close a few of those apps and clear up some much-needed mental RAM.

Understanding Stress

Stress, the body’s reaction to a challenge or demand, can be a sneaky beast. It creeps up on you like a ninja and, before you know it, you’re wearing your stress like a second skin. Your heart races, your muscles tense, and your mind becomes a whirlwind of ‘what-ifs’ and ‘should-haves.’ It’s as if your brain is preparing to run a marathon, but instead of getting in shape, it’s running in circles.

Daily Stress Management Techniques

Let’s get down to brass tacks and talk about how to turn down the volume on stress. Here are some daily strategies:

1. Prioritize Your Tasks: Make a list, check it twice, and then do a little happy dance when you cross something off.

2. Take ‘Me Time’: Carve out time for activities that recharge your batteries. Reading, yoga, or watching cat videos—no judgment here.

3. Breathe Deeply: Try some deep breathing exercises. Inhale peace, exhale chaos—and maybe that burnt toast smell from breakfast.

4. Laugh It Off: Laughter can reduce stress hormones, so cue up your favourite sitcom or stand- up special. Just maybe not at work.

Long-Term Stress Reduction Practices
For a more profound impact, consider these lifestyle changes:

1. Exercise Regularly: Get those endorphins flowing with some physical activity. Just don’t overdo it and become the gym’s version of a superhero.

2. Healthy Eating: Good nutrition can help manage stress. This doesn’t mean you have to give up donuts, but maybe don’t make them a food group.

3. Quality Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep per night. If counting sheep doesn’t work, try counting tranquil turtles or something less jumpy.

4. Mindfulness or Meditation: Spend some time in quiet reflection or meditation. If sitting still is hard, meditative walking is a thing—just watch out for lamp posts.


Remember, managing stress is not about eliminating it completely (because let’s face it, that would require moving to a deserted island, and even then, you’d probably stress about coconuts falling on your head). It’s about developing a toolkit to handle the stress balls life throws at you without dropping them all over the place.

Implement these strategies, and you may find yourself less like a frazzled squirrel and more like a Zen master, even when life gets nuts. Stay tuned for our next post, where we’ll decode the secret language of body language in relationships. Spoiler alert: Crossing your arms might not mean you’re cold.

John van der Linde Psychological Counsellor


The Fine Art of Listening in Relationships


Imagine this: your partner is sharing something important, but your mind is racing to the game you missed last night. Suddenly, you’re asked, “What do you think?” Oops, you’ve just been caught in the act—of not listening. We’ve all been there, but the difference between a good relationship and a great one often lies in the fine art of listening. So, put down that imaginary remote and tune in; we’re about to turn up the volume on effective communication.

The Common Pitfalls of Communication

Many of us play the wrong notes in the grand symphony of conversation. Some people treat dialogue like a tennis match, eagerly waiting to serve their response without truly hearing the other person’s words. Others might nod along but are secretly compiling a grocery list in their heads. Then there are the interrupters, who jump in mid-sentence as if the conversation were a race to the finish line.

Imagine a listener like a goalkeeper at a penalty kick—instead of catching the ball, they’re already running for the showers. Not effective, right? Let’s look at how we can all become MVPs of listening.

Active Listening Techniques

1. Give Nonverbal Cues: Show you’re engaged by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and leaning slightly forward—just don’t fall over.

2. Avoid Interrupting: Let them lay out their entire thought, even if you have the best response since sliced bread.

3. Reflect and Ask Questions: Paraphrase their points and ask clarifying questions. It shows you’re not just waiting to discuss your new braai.

4. Manage Your Reactions: Keep your emotions in check. If you start looking like a deer in headlights, you’ve probably stopped listening.

Implementing Active Listening in Your Relationship

Active listening can be like trying a new dance move—it feels awkward at first, but with practice, you’ll be gliding across the floor of communication with ease. Start small; practice with friends or even while ordering your morning coffee. You might be surprised how much better your interactions become when people feel truly heard.

What about with your partner? Try setting aside time each day to talk without distractions. And yes, that means putting the phone on silent. You may just find that your partner’s anecdotes are more interesting than your Facebook feed.


Mastering the art of listening can transform your relationships from a series of misunderstandings to a harmonious dialogue. Remember, listening is a skill, and like any skill, it can be improved with practice and patience. So next time your partner is speaking, treat their words like your favourite podcast—listen closely, and you might just learn something new. And who knows, they might just reveal the secret to finding that missing sock from the laundry.

Happy listening!

John van der Linde

Psychological Counsellor


The Secret Language of Body Language in Relationships


Ever wish your partner came with subtitles? Decoding body language in relationships can sometimes feel like trying to understand Morse code. But don’t worry, you don’t need to be a mind reader to crack the code. Let’s explore the unspoken dialogue of shrugs, winks, and crossed arms, so you can become fluent in the language of limbs.

Decoding Body Language

Body language speaks volumes about our innermost feelings, often louder than words themselves. For example, crossed arms might signal defensiveness, or it could just mean the room’s too chilly. A genuine smile involves the eyes, not just the mouth—otherwise, it’s like eating a donut without the filling: nice, but something’s missing.

Think of body language as your partner’s personal news ticker—the key is learning which headlines are breaking news and which are just old reruns.

Improving Your Own Body Language

Now, let’s talk about your own nonverbal cues. It’s like directing your own silent movie; you want to make sure your actions support the storyline.

1. Maintain Eye Contact: Just enough to show you’re interested, but not so much that it turns into a staring contest.

2. Lean In: This shows engagement. Lean in when your partner is speaking, but don’t invade their personal bubble—you’re not a human blanket.

3. Mirroring: Subtly mimic your partner’s gestures and posture. It’s like saying, “I get you,” without uttering a word—just don’t turn it into a game of Simon Says.

4. Open Posture: Keep your arms and legs uncrossed to signal openness. But relax, this isn’t a yoga class; you don’t have to twist into a pretzel.

Body Language Pitfalls to Avoid:
While improving your body cues, beware of these common blunders:

1. Over-Gesturing: Too much hand-waving can make you look like an overexcited mime.

2. Fidgeting: Constantly tapping your foot or drumming your fingers might signal impatience or nerves. Unless you’re trying to start a one-man band, keep it in check.

3. Inconsistency: If your words say, “I’m listening,” but your body says, “I’d rather be fishing,” you’ve got a mismatch that even Sherlock would notice.


Becoming adept at body language can transform your relationship from guessing games to genuine understanding. Remember, it’s not about perfection—it’s about connection. So next time you’re with your partner, pay attention to the silent symphony of nonverbal cues. And don’t worry if you miss a beat, even the best dancer’s step on each other’s toes now and then.

In our next post, we’ll tackle the challenge of changing negative thinking patterns. Until then, keep your body talking and your ears open—just remember, not all conversations require words.

John van der Linde

Psychological Counsellor